COMMON SENSE

Noun.

Etymology: repr. Greek κοινὴ αἴσθησις, Latin sensus commūnis, French sens commun.

Definition:

a. The endowment of natural intelligence possessed by rational beings; ordinary, normal or average understanding; the plain wisdom which is everyone's inheritance.

b. More emphatically: Good sound practical sense; combined tact and readiness in dealing with the every-day affairs of life; general sagacity.

(Source: Oxford English Dictionary Online)

I feel like there are a lot of people out there who would benefit from knowing this definition. Or really, even being aware of the concept.

People who could benefit:

Marketers

Politicians

Sales people

Children

Co-workers

This is not a full list obviously, but serious repeat offenders most in need of rehabilitation.

We all have off days sure, but generally when those of us who have mastered this skill have done something stupid, we recognize it quickly and apologize if it is in front of others or hide it and bury it in our memory if we are alone. This is the way it should be.

Do not revel in your stupidity. Do not flaunt it. DO NOT inflict it on those of us smarter than you, we become annoyed and often effectively passive aggressive. We will cause you to suffer in any way we know how; Social Darwinism at its best.

I do not suffer fools gladly and neither should you. Speak up for common sense! Explain it to those less fortunate to whom it is not a natural state of being.

And if nicely explaining and/or flash cards does not work: do your passive aggressive best.

WARNING: Lotion May Contain C4

I’ve flown many times in my life, but since I moved to Mass, I’m flying more often to go home to see my family. Because of this, you’d think I have many horror stories about TSA and all that, I really don’t. I’m an experienced traveler so I usually don’t have any trouble. I know to have all my liquids in 3 oz. bottles in a quart size Ziploc bag. I know to take off my shoes and coat before going through security. I know not to wear bulky clothing, etc. etc.

I was not aware, however, that some lotions contain C4 or other kinds of explosives. That I learned on my way back to Boston after Christmas.

I had an unlucky morning on the 2nd, first of all, my flight was at 6am so I had to be up at 4am so I could get to the airport, then once I got there, I got pulled for the x-ray machine. All before I got some coffee. I usually don’t get pulled for extra security; I can think of one other time and I was 16 and they didn’t like my backpack at LaGuardia.

I’m not sure what they were looking for considering I was wearing skinny jeans and a form-fitting sweater, but through the x-ray machine I went like a good little drone…I mean citizen. After you finish looking ridiculous with your feet spread and your hands over your head, you step out and they swab your hands with a cotton-like disk and put it in a machine. When they did this to me, the machine turned red and started beeping and flashing: EXPLOSIVES DETECTED.

I’m not really the kind of girl who plays with explosives at 4 o’clock in the morning, so I was a little confused. My confusion was augmented when the TSA agent asked me if I had put lotion on my hands that morning. It is January, it is cold and dry, yeah I put lotion on so my hands don’t bleed. Well, she says, lotion returns a positive for explosives on the machine, we’ve been getting this a lot since it’s winter.

Really? A machine, that I assume is exceptionally expensive, meant to detect explosives, can’t differentiate between dynamite and moisturizer?

I feel so safe.